oBLOGilation, Tepid Bean Water, Danny Devito is NOT Detective Pikachu

Welcome back and welcome home to my loyal readers, whether it be just one or 1000, I am so happy that you have decided to waste perhaps 3 minutes on your life depending on your literary fluency on what may be the stupidest blog of all time.

I preached at the beginning of this exercise, back over a year ago when the temptation to have a blog, that I would offer no consistency and no expectation or obligation (or oBLOGilation hahahahahahapleasemakemestop). Boy, have I exceeded in keeping those promises. Unfortunately, however, there are some people who actually enjoy this disaster and ask me when I’m posting next. This warms my cold dead heart you guys. It really does. I smile for the next hour when I’m told it. Yet still, I lay convinced that my words are a waste of time with no substance and I should not bother. I’m trying to change that.  

The temperatures are subarctic in Tuscaloosa. Meaning that they are below my preference of 70 degrees. Anything below my preference is the worst and should be illegal. I brought mittens today entirely for the sake of purchasing Iced Coffee.

Iced coffee is a weird concept honestly. It is absolutely delicious and should be consumed as frequently as possible, YOLO if you will. I’d consider myself a coffee enthusiast. Someone who enjoys cold brew and different roasts and prefers it black if the brew is good. Commonly, people such as myself (Food lovers are foodies, coffee lovers are coffees. Oh wait that doesn’t work) have such a holier than thou personality in regards to coffee. You can only drink it black. Pumpkin spice is illegal. While I am a strong enthusiast of a good cup of coffee, I also enjoy those pumps of flavor that are likely 2000 calories per pump, or the shot of sugar syrup from Starbucks. My standards are weirdly high and weirdly low when it comes to bean water. I would pay 10 dollars for a cup of coffee, no questions asked. I would also drink a glass of tepid water with a single coffee bean in it that soaked for less than thirty minutes.

Unless you live under a rock, the trailer for Detective Pikachu was released. It left me and the Internet with many questions. My questions revolve around the fact that I only played one Pokemon game ever (emerald, apparently they’re named after gems/colors?) and my stupid brain could not complete it (I was sixteen years old). So what is a pokemon? What does it do? They fight I think? You become a pokemon trainer at age 10? Do you have to catch them all? What happens if you don’t catch them all?

My biggest question did come from the fact though that when the announcement of Detective Pikachu was released a while back, someone told me that Danny Devito was playing Pikachu. And I have held onto the belief until the release date when it turns out it was Ryan Reynolds. I was heartbroken. Ryan reynolds is a cool dude and all. But the Daniel Devito. The Daniel Devito who can’t go into space due to his height.

The UA Libraries Group Study Board posting still remains the true forum of the students, the true representation of who we are as people and as a student body. Thanksgiving is next week so there are far fewer groups but I digress.

Ultimately and forever you are loved and appreciated, and I hope the words I type offer something to you. While I hope it’s a laugh and a break from reality, any emotion this elicits is a good one. We forget to feel as a species at times. We forget to acknowledge what’s going on in our heads and in our brains and just go through the motions. You are in the Lounge so feel whatever you want. Be angry at me for being a moron who wasted your time by signing you up on the email list for this blog. Be happy, be sad. Just continue to be and you will be set.