uGH toO maNy CarBs

Hey y’all I’m back I’ve decided this is going to be a weekly every Friday type deal to truly capture my weeks. I feel like I’m Creed from The Office where Ryan helps Creed start a blog but in reality he just opens a word document for him to type on as his "blog".

It’s Friday the Thirteenth. I keep seeing commercials for the movie “Happy Death Day” and if any of y’all see it (I refuse) tell me how it ends. It’s this preppy college girl's birthday and she ends up being murdered at the end of the night by a person wearing this horrible baby mask. She then wakes up and has to live through each day over and over again groundhog’s day style. It's pretty awful. The part that makes me angry is how her roommate or friend or something tries giving her a cupcake and she says “ugH tOO maNy carBs” and throws it away. This comes up every day on my Facebook as an ad and I’m getting pretty mad about it. I think the roommate who gave her the cupcake is the killer, but my theory is that the cupcake was poisoned to begin with and when she threw it out the roommate had to finish the job.

On the topic of Friday the Thirteenth, I completely broke my face on this day in January after a bike crash. My nose was broken, I had very bad bruises underneath my eyes and I completely stopped biking for a while. I walked back to the spot where I broke my nose to see if the universe would break my nose and the universe disappointed me yet again. There’s a little dent-type-chip thing in the concrete at the impact point so I paid my respects to that exact spot.

As I type, I continue to address this to an apparent, likely imaginary audience. I like doing this, it’s comparable to that picture where a guy is talking to a brick wall. You guys are the brick wall. I am the person that talks constantly. Here we are.

In University of Alabama news, Arkansas is playing Alabama football at our homecoming game this Saturday which is funny to me because my boyfriend (Matthew, I will mention him pretty frequently) is from Arkansas so I’m being especially mean. I paid my friend in Taco Bell to make a sign for me. I was stuck between “BOO PIG SOIEE” or “NATURAL STATE??? MORE LIKE NATURAL LOSERS AM I RIGHT LADIES”. I chose the first one because I think the second one would only make me laugh which is not the point of a sign (the sign looks really good by the way).

I guess that's all I have to say, if this really counts as me saying anything. I'm on my third edit right now because I found six spelling errors after I posted it originally. Maybe I care about this a little more than I thought I did. Still not much at all. 

In summary, tell me how Happy Death Day ends, the universe let me down in breaking my nose again, and adding "AM I RIGHT LADIES" to any joke makes it hilarious.